Eye Full of Sandy

     After volunteering in Mississippi after Hurricane Katrina, I'm all too familiar with the devastation a hurricane can bring.  Even that experience and the ability to see news reports and pictures of the damage from Hurricane Sandy doesn't compare to the stark reality of witnessing the destruction with your own eyes.

     This past weekend, doors flew open for me to be part of a hurricane relief assessment team and tour areas of the Jersey Shore and New York that were hit hard by Hurricane Sandy.  Our 4-day journey brought us together with pastors and volunteers who have been working on the front lines in Ocean and Middlesex Counties in New Jersey, and in Coney Island, the Bronx, and Babylon, NY.  These people are amazing!  Despite the heartbreak around them, they contain an infectious energy and vision for helping people recover from this storm.

     Just please know - wherever you are reading this - YOU ARE NEEDED!   There is alot of work to be done.  Right now, there are thousands of people who have been displaced all along the coast and in the inner cities.  There are thousands of people who need help clearing their home and mitigating the mold.  Yes - still!  Many of these people will also need help re-building in the near future.  Funds will be needed for tools and supplies.  There is something that everyone can do! 

     I encourage you to be thinking of how you can help.  Think about:  what you are willing to do, where you would like to do it, when would you like to do it.  With your help, someone's life will be changed forever.  ~

Daddy Knows Best!

     Pictures are worth 1,000 words - like this one I have of me with my parents outside of their Florida home.  It was the last picture taken of my dad.  Mom was sporting her cancer wig and dad, holding a travel cup of coffee, had his fishing hat on to cover up his chemo head.  I’m in the middle with poofy eyes, trying to smile.  It was the end of my visit with them, and each time I went back home, I left not knowing if it would be the last time I’d get to see them again on this side of heaven.  Turns out, two weeks later cancer finally kicked dad’s butt and 3 days after that we said our goodbyes.  So in memory of my dad, here's 500 of those 1,000 words.....

~ Life Lessons from Bob ~

#1.  There are no do-overs.   The cancer doctors gave my dad 1 year to live. Well, my dad was stubborn and hung around for 3 more years! Every 6 weeks, I would visit for a long weekend, and we’d hang out in the recliners in his room and watch “In the Heat of the Night” and “Walker Texas Ranger” recordings and nap, wake up, chat, eat popsicles and watch some more. He wasn’t a super open guy, so I was surprised one night when he looked at me and said, “You know, if I had the chance to do it all over again, I wouldn’t have worked so much. I would have spent more time with you kids.” We were blessed to have that time together at the end, but it doesn’t always work out that way.  Make your today count!

#2.  You catch more flies with honey than vinegar.   Gotta be honest – I don’t know why I remember this or what I did for him to say it to me. I must’ve been a sass-ball like {ahem} one of my daughters {ahem}, but what a true statement!  It even says it in the Bible: “Pleasant words are like a honeycomb; sweetness to the soul and healing to the bones.“ (Proverbs 16:24)  In other words – Be Sweet!     

#3.  Always keep a $20 bill in your bra for emergencies. (Yes, he said bra!  Remember - I’m a girl.) But since these are good words for anyone, if you are a guy it would probably be okay to keep it in your pocket.  I suspect that’s what my dad did. And that’s what I do too…or my shoe, that works too.

#4.  Nothing in life is free.  Everything comes at a cost. If it doesn’t cost you money, it costs your pride or can leave you beholden to someone or to something, such as a negative emotion. Even the most  free thing of all – the gift of salvation through Jesus Christ – came at a price. It was free to me and it is free to you, but it cost Jesus His very life. So weigh your decisions carefully; if it looks too good to be true, it probably is.

#5.   Birds and bees.  Oh man, I’m sorry – Bob’s actual words were on the crude side, so I can’t post them here. But they saved me from many a comprising situation, so they merit mention. It went something to the affect that when things get passionate between a guy and a girl, the guy’s common sense goes out the window and he is no longer thinking with his brain or even his heart.  So girls – make sure you use your brain and don’t get in that situation in the first place.   ‘Nuff said. 

#6.  Credit cards are for a true emergency.  A true emergency is more along the lines of car repairs, not “I don’t have a shirt to wear to the party Friday night” or “I need to get everyone the perfect gift for Christmas but have no job.”  Thanks Dad, for the best college graduation gift ever – a $450 credit card bill.  Lesson learned!

#7.  And last but certainly not least - Never do a jig too close to the Christmas tree.   No explanation needed, but you just might see it on America’s Funniest Home Videos one day.

Mom & Dad "Back in the Day"

What about you?  Have any words of wisdom handed down from your parents?   

Leave a comment – I’d love to hear them!

Closet Full of Masks

     It was just Halloween time, and my son announced that he would like a costume with a full mask this year.  Why?  Because he would like to make the rounds twice – one with his normal face, then one with his mask on so people wouldn’t recognize him and he could get twice the candy!

 

     We all like to wear masks, don’t we?   My daughter recently made a comment to me, “Mom, church people aren’t as good as you think.”  Um… ouch?!?   It was a heart-breaking revelation that actually threw me back to my own teen years, where I struggled to figure out who I was.  I was basically a good person, crazy, goofy, sassy yet sweet; I loved church and youth group and had a great bunch of friends there; I had school friends that I didn’t really mix with my church friends because we participated in different activities; I spoke three different languages – the one I used at home, the one I used at church, and the one I used everywhere else.  So I guess you could say that I had a closet full of masks.  As I’ve grown up, I’ve worked hard at weeding them out.  Some just plain dry rotted – old, some vile, some no longer used, and most I have decided to just throw away.  Although I try to live transparently, my daughter’s comment made me realize that I would be lying if I said that I didn’t have an emergency mask or two tucked in a drawer somewhere.  

 

     What about you?  Have enough masks to fill a costume shop?   Well, guess what  – we’re not meant to wear masks.  Nope, sorry but it’s true.  God created us to be amazing and with incredible potential – but we wear our masks because we care more about what people think.  We put them on out of fear and insecurity and a desire to be liked and accepted.  Some people wear them to hide something they are ashamed of or a behavior that they know is incorrect.  

 

     But the awesome part is................

 

Mud Runs and Coffee

     Today is my birthday, and although I will not say my age out loud (EVER) I will say I am the age of the people who I always saw as older and “mature”.   Rats!   Rats that I’m there, and rats that I don’t think I’m as “mature” as I’m supposed to be yet – maybe that’s a good thing though!

     This weekend was my mother-in-law’s memorial service, so this morning my thoughts were all over the place. They landed on a dear friend of mine who lost her battle with ovarian cancer three years ago.  Perhaps it is a morbid thought for my birthday morning, but the unknown of the future stared back at me in the mirror.  I realized that as she woke on this # birthday of hers, she probably had no idea that she would only have 7 more years to live.  If she had, would she have lived differently?   Would there be places she would visit, things she would do with her daughters?  She was my 2^nd friend who died at that age from the same disease – is it possible that I may only have 7 years left to live?  Or 5 or 2 even?  How then will I live?  What am I going to do to be sure that I leave behind a strong and meaningful legacy? 

     Then my final thought,

it’s too early for this – where is my coffee?

On Sept. 15^th, I will be participating in my first Mud Run, the Bill Bottino Mud Run for Cancer, and I dedicate my efforts to my dear friend Tish.

Minute to Win It

“You can do anything for a minute!”   

     I could hear Tina, my spin trainer, shouting above the music as she pushed us at a “10” on an interval ride.  The only difference was tonight I was on the treadmill, not in spin class.  After watching Bob train Daphne using speed intervals on "The Biggest Loser", I was inspired to mix it up some.  I was already warmed up from Zumba, so I started at my base speed then increased it by .5 mph every minute.  Run 1 minute, walk 1 minute – it was amazing!  I pushed myself faster than I’ve ever gone on the treadmill.   Did I break a world record?  Nah.  Did I look as strong as I felt?  Probably not.   Was I as strong - and confident - as I felt?  Ohhh yes!  I can’t wait for my next treadmill day to try it again.

     One minute, just one little minute… next time you are struggling or you want to give up, just find your focus and tell yourself – “I can do anything for a minute” and keep pressing on.  You are stronger than you think!

Footprints of Friends

     This is the last post in my 3-part series “Footprints” - people who have inspired me on my journey to health.   Starting on any journey can be scary and difficult; that’s why it’s so important to find others who have either gone before you or are walking beside you to spur you on.  Their path can give you motivation to keep going or work harder when the going gets tough.  As you can read from my other posts “Footprints of a Classmate” and “Footprints of a Husband”, they can be from anywhere in your life.  (Even on tv – Jillian Michaels, I want your abs!)  Sometimes the people who inspire us are right before our eyes.  Like my friend Claire, who has tirelessly taught a First Place for Health Sunday School class for several years.  Her passion and her commitment for bringing women into wholeness, not just giving diet tips, pushes me to press on and to make a difference in the lives of others.  As a full-time executive and mother of three, Claire has introduced a “boot camp” at 7 am on Saturday mornings and is changing women inch by inch, pound by pound, spirit by spirit.   Claire truly walks her talk, and I admire her greatly.  Or my friend Jen.  When Jen and I first became friends about 10 years ago, she was a self-proclaimed couch potato.   With 3 kids and her youngest in diapers, she routinely said, “nah” to exercise.  Jen and her husband recently completed their first marathon, and I am so proud of her! The health switch just flipped on for her, and she hasn’t looked back.  She’s a great example to many women, to her children, and to their friends.  I admire her self-discipline and commitment.   And finally, my friend Ashley.  I’ve always loved Ashley’s creativity and her spirit.  When I was thinking of joining a gym, she’s the one who convinced me and now we go to the same gym, along with about 6 other people that we know.  She’s not afraid to work hard, and she pushes others towards achieving by her example. She also just recently started a photography business Ashley Elaine Photography (yes, that was a shameless plug), and I am so proud of her.  She kicked fear out the door and went for it. 

     So to my friends, for your genuine-ness, your tenacity, and your courage – thank you for laying down your footprints and inspiring me on this journey!

Footprints of A Husband

     Here is the 2^nd set of “Footprints” - a series of posts about people who have inspired me on my journey to health.  This set belongs to my husband who lost close to 100 lbs last year.  I am so proud of him!  For years, he carried this extra weight, this “monkey on his back” as he called it.  As with most people, the pounds creeped on a little here and a little there; lose 35, gain back 50.  He basically played chicken with his health - avoided doctors, bought bigger clothes, started, stopped, then re- started exercise and weight loss programs.  Over the course of 20 years as you can imagine, this started taking a toll.  It was affecting every area of his life, and there came a point where he had enough.  He started small, one step at a time, one change at a time.  First, he cut out caffeine and sugar.  Then he started drinking 96 oz of fluids a day.  He stopped eating fast food, began eating fruit for snack, and no longer ate late at night.  He also began going to bed earlier, instead of being a night owl.  Over the course of a year, he lost the weight and also had some other results.  Some obvious ones, but others not so obvious to most people like my personal favorite – his feet stopped smelling on a regular basis!  After cutting out sugar and losing 100 lbs, we were anticipating great things from his blood work.  We were shocked when he was diagnosed as a Type 2 diabetic and his triglycerides were off the chart – AFTER changing his lifestyle and losing the weight!  In short, even though he had made changes, his unhealthy lifestyle for years had done so much damage to his entire system that he was basically a heart attack waiting to happen.  Thankfully, he is managing his diabetes and triglycerides with medication and exercise.  And thankfully, he is no longer destroying his own body by his lifestyle choices.

     How does this bittersweet story inspire me?  In a few ways – for one, just his plain tenacity.  It’s not easy to lose 100 lbs.  Since then he has joined a gym, and he is sticking to it.  He has researched his disease and continues to make wise food choices that help to heal his body.  His experience has shown me that everything we put into our bodies really does count.  If he had those extreme health issues after he lost the weight, what was going on inside of his body while he was carrying the weight?  What is going on inside of my body after I over indulge?  And is it really worth it?  Seeing the changes in his body from staying hydrated also inspired me to keep my body hydrated.  I was simply amazed to see some of the differences that I know were from him drinking fluids.  I plan to post another blog on the benefits of drinking water, but seriously – if keeping your body hydrated, keeps your feet from smelling, imagine the other more significant benefits your body is reaping!

     So congratulations Ike!  And thank you for leaving me foot prints that I can learn from.

Pull Up Your Bootstraps

     For many people, the new year means a time for resolutions and new beginnings.  We already know this, so let’s just cut to the chase….

If you want new beginnings and you want change to occur in your life,
YOU have to be the driver.  No one can do it for you.

     This is true whether you are reading this in January or October.  It all begins with you!  Albert Einstein once said: 

“Insanity is continuing to do the same thing over and over again
and expecting different results.”

     So if you want to succeed in your resolutions and experience new beginnings, jump off the crazy train and make some changes. Pull up your bootstraps and get busy with… 

…your mind – You can try to make all of the changes you want, but without a change in your thought patterns, you will be defeated. Thought tapes from the past need to go and new ones need to be made. Think positively.  Use empowering action words that give you direction and vision.  Live in the present.  Yesterday is past, it’s gone, it’s over, let it go – today is new.  Wrap your mind around it and embrace it.

…your emotions – Your thoughts also affect your emotions.  In fact, thoughts and emotions are like peanut butter and jelly; they simply go together.  Make up your mind that you are going to own your emotions.  Excuses and blame no longer have a place.  Your emotions belong to you.  Release what is dragging you down and replace it with positive, life-breathing determination and passion.

…your body – You only get one body. Make up your mind that you are going to take care of it.  (See how it all goes back to your mind?)  Start by getting a complete physical from your doctor(s).  Then make other small adjustments to your lifestyle like:  get moving doing something you enjoy, not endure; drink plenty of water; nix the soda, even if it’s diet; ditch the extra sweets, treats, and drinks; drink plenty of water; use smaller portions and add green to your meals; and finally, make nutritional substitutions – steamed or grilled instead of fried, an egg white veggie flatbread instead of an egg, bacon, and cheese biscuit, whole wheat bread instead of white, vinaigrette dressing on the side instead of a creamy dressing bath. Oh, and did I mention drink plenty of water?

     Overwhelmed?  Don’t be - remember from my post “Seasons Change”, for changes to stick they need to be approached holistically. You have to think it, believe it, and live it for change to occur. This is a journey.  Every change doesn’t need to be made at once, and permanent change doesn’t occur overnight. If you have a bad day, no big deal - begin new the next day and keep looking forward.  The key is that YOU have to do it. 

     It is your life, your mind, your body, your emotions – own up! Throw off your excuses and empower yourself because no one can make these changes for you. Pull up your bootstraps and get started today!

~Take an inventory of where you are and where you want to be. Make a plan on how you will get there. Include excuses that you use and other roadblocks and what you are going to do to circumvent them.  You can do this! ~